Why you shouldn’t be afraid of change
Every new semester at my school we get to change the position of our desks in the student room. Therefore, if you are on a two-year program, you get to change your seat about four times at least. I have always been the kind of person who once gets comfortable in a given spot, don’t want to let go! I always learn to like that spot and make it the best spot I may ever want to sit at. And don’t you think this is like Sheldon’s (Big Bang Theory) obsession with that corner sofa seat – it isn’t! This happens every semester. It becomes really hard for me to leave my previous spot in the room, and yet I also look forward to a new location in the room! The view is surely different and so is everything else around the new spot. I get to interact more with my new neighbor(s) and get to share a closer environment with them. What strikes me most is the comfort I always tend to have while at my old place, and how I wouldn’t exchange it for even the mere promise of the good views, comfortable seat or better neighbors at my upcoming place. This probably rhymes with ‘the devil you know is better than the angel you don’t’ saying, and oh please don’t take it out of context. I mean, it is just a promise; no guarantee for any of those promises at the new spot! This spot changing routine probably is just a symptom of my deep-rooted ‘metathesiophobia or tropophobia’ – the fear of change! We become so comfortable in our current state, and our brains clearly know that the future is always uncertain, however promising it may seem. And as long we have any relative comfort in our current state, we shall always find it difficult to make a move in any new direction. Most people say ‘Change is a fact of life’, and it’s true, in the passage of time lies the unavoidable change we all experience, however resentful we may feel about it. And if we really take it on as a fact of life, then it’s something we have to accept – in the same way we have to breathe in order to live. FACT: Change happens every second! But probably you don’t mind the small changes that take place subconsciously within our lives. What probably scares you most is the BIG changes that you have to take on. If probably I knew that I was moving an inch every day to the place I shall be at in 2 years, I may not be afraid to move. But if you tell me that I just have to move from point A to B in an instant, I may find all sorts of excuses of choosing to stay at the place am comfortable at in the moment. Eventually change catches up with each of us. The world we live in is an ‘active’ one; each of us makes decisions that affect one another and thus change becomes inevitable. Also the untimely fact that we seize to exist creates spot-on changes that we have to embrace ASAP (both for the living and dead).
I have thus managed to accept change, even when am not sure whether it shall create positive or negative differences in my life. The trick I have always used is to positively look forward to any change and to approach it swiftly and love it, and get acclimatized to what there is about whatever is changing; after all, what other option is there? The sooner the better and the easier it is to take on! Denial won’t take the change away; neither can any refusal to change be effected. You either change or change will forcefully change you. We just have to embrace our fears and face them head-on. The beauty in accepting change immediately is that you don’t get to forcefully be moved from point A to B, but rather, once you recognize the fact that this movement is inevitable (as will always be in most cases), you move by yourself and at your comfort and not wait for any external pushes.
So, as you enjoy the comfort and joy that spring brings, start to embrace summer too! Look mostly at the positives that each change promises. Don’t think about how much you shall miss the beautiful weather of spring, or even dread the heat or the high humidity during summer (or even summer’s weekly rains); but rather think about the fun at the beach, the feeling you get when you rush into a cool air-conditioned room during summer, or how you always look forward to that cold favorite drink during summer. Only that way shall you take on CHANGE; by paying more attention to the joys that always surely exist in any change. Look out for the positives only!
So, when that phone you are so used to gets lost or broken, look forward to the opportunity of getting a new one! When you move into that new neighborhood, look forward to making new friends, discovery of new hobbies, and finding a new favorite eating place. All these can only be experienced by taking on new ventures or changing something in one’s life. And in case you are wondering, am already settled in and comfortable at my new spot, because I want to make it too, the best spot I have ever sat at.
Being resilient means that life throws at us a lot of unknowns, and we comfortably and easily take them on heads-on, in the best and most reliable way we know. Thus, for a resilient individual, accepting and dealing with any changes that come along in life is no big deal. It creates no fear, and is rather seen as another opportunity to become better and even more resilient!